Is Your Partner Upset? Here Is An Easy Way To Calm Them
We are all human, sometimes we get upset, angry or sad even without reason. And sometimes we simply don’t want to talk just because we prefer to think alone.
Your partner can be at different state of mind at different times, you know this already. You may or may not be the cause of their state of mind at a particular time.
When your partner gets upset, you will feel upset as well (but you don’t have to be). Most of all, you will feel confused, because it is like they have become another person, different from who you are used to.
You can see they are in pain, and you want to do something to help them. But when you try to do something it often feels like things are getting worse. Or you don’t see any result at all.
Why is it that everything you do doesn’t work?
What can you do to calm them down?
The answer to the first question is simple: it is because they are angry. Someone who is angry is angry, they are just that – angry.
Nothing can be done about that.
And that’s your answer to the second question – do nothing. We often ignore this ‘solution’ with a concerned heart. The need to restore things to normal presses hard on us and we fail to realize that their nothing much we can do to change the situation.
When you try to do something and it doesn’t work, you could end up being angry as well. This could in turn fuel your partner’s anger. Doing nothing will keep you sane to protect them from their angry self. It is the best way to care at that moment.
When your partner is angry, try to stay present, watchful and accept that they are in pain. Give them only as much companionship as they would accept. Giving more than the desired attention will work against you. Sometimes it is even better to leave them alone, especially if you are the cause of their anger.
Understand that there is hardly anything you can do to change their feelings at that moment. They have to do that on their own, leave them to self-heal. Feelings come and go, sometimes without reason. Soon they will be back to their own self again.
So next time your partner gets angry, try doing nothing if everything else has always failed. Doing nothing doesn’t mean you don’t care. In this case, doing nothing is actually something. It keeps you sane enough to watch over them, protecting them from their angry self.
I hope you find this practice helpful.
Have a beautiful relationship!